Sigh
It seems to be harder and harder these days to get myself to sit down at a computer for a couple minutes that it takes to update this thing. Between work, yoga, and just plain sleeping, I'm exhausted. I barely have the energy to get up and meditate in the morning and then again at night. It's day 75 and I've forgotten him. Not a I-hate-you forgetting, but a I-can't-get-too-attached- must-let-go forgetting. It's strange, having to come up with that self-concept once again. Does caring for someone do that? Take away the idea of who you are due to being concerned with what is best for the other person, or is it better to remain apart, and risk never having real connection? I've been trying to step back on to the spiritual path, but doing so after being lost in the woods, adventuring for so long, the pre-trodden seems almost too tame. What could be tamer than the Buddha? Then again, perhaps my challenge lies in making that serenity an all around thing. This world we live in isn't tame at all. Summer is wearing me thin. I count the days until classes start again: 62.
Have a nice trip, see you next fall
It is strange having someone you care about so far away. I suppose similar yet different pangs must be felt by parents when children move away.
I've been writing a ton the past week as well, and have discovered that if I write at least a page every day, I'll fill up my latest journal by the end of the summer. This is good news for me, a writer who loves to switch mediums and hardly ever finishes what she starts.
Speaking of starting, this past new moon was the day I started my "vegan recharge diet modifications" (fancy lingo for not eating so much crap) to help me shine throughout the summer! I've started using wheatgrass and bluegreen algae again. So far I feel good, more balenced. I wonder if all the chloryllphyl will make me more in touch with plants... (silly thought)
