Whispering Wind

France voted a defiant NON! in the voting to see if it would approve a EU constitution. I for one, am a bit pleased. The EU, at least to my limited knowledge, presents itself as too much of a culture-dissolver instead of its origional intent to be a unifier. Europe is too diverse to amalgamate.

;) There's my little blurb on the world scene.

Well not forever, but a while. I decided against summer classes. It seems now I am no longer surrounded by computers at school, I am neglecting my blog. But no worries. I'll try to keep my summer exploits fairly current. Andrew's leaving for Shoshoni Yoga retreat in a week, and he will be sorely missed. Perhaps I'll use his three month absence to work on my yoga form as well.... Being in love is great, isn't it?

Weather is beautiful, and I saw a hopeful sight on the way to school today- a little baby bird who was struggling to fly was fluttering across University Street this morning, narrowly escaping getting hit twice. At the last minute, right before the tires of some huge SUV was going to crush it, it mangaged to flutter to the grass at the curb. I was so scared for it, as I saw tires just barely miss, that when it got to the grass, it was like a weight had been lifted. Somehow nature finds a way to survive in this concrete jungle humans have created. That baby bird reminded me that no matter how dire the situation looks, there is grass on the other side. We have to flutter and struggle as hard as we can, but making it to safety and rest is possible.

Well I think I've found a keeper in Mr. Mysterious. We spent the day together yesterday, and it's amazing. We finish each other's sentences and say things at the same time all the time. God must have something in store for this...

What does it mean when a guy tells you you're too cute?
I THINK IT MEANS I'M FREAKIN HAPPY!!!!
Well yesterday I did it. I left my email address on his car. Lo and behold he emailed me! I'm not the only one who was feeling something.

This time, though I've learned my lesson. Girls should never put too many expectations on something new.

I was talking about this with a co-worker of mine and we came up with a metaphor: "Testing the apple."
Testing the apple means that, for example, in the past I became involved with guys who seemed wonderful at first, and then when I got to really know them, they ended up horrible. Much like when a person bites into a shiny red apple only to find it is mealy inside. How dissapointing. It's almost enough to put a person off apples althogether. But if you push on the apple a little before biting and it's soft, you can tell ahead of time that it will be mealy. Therfore, you must "test the apple". Same concept with guys. No projecting onto them what you think they are; test them a little. That way you can save yourself a mouthful (and a heartful) of disappointment.

[i]I'm still sooooooo happy!!!!!![/i]

I watched Pretty in Pink the other day, a guilty pleasure from the 80s era of the bratpack. My shy yet tormented attitude towards this guy lately, I realized, was pretty well summed up by a quote from Duckie, one of the characters in the movie, so heck, here it is:

"I love this woman, and I have to tell her. And if she laughs, she laughs. And if she doesn't love me, she doesn't. But if I don't find out... Oh, I love her too much ... She's gonna laugh"

(except of course with the occasional male pronoun to replace the she's) :D

Did a foolhardy and hopelessly romantic thing on Friday: I put a note on the car of the guy (Andrew) I've been eyeballing all semester. Basically it said I was too shy to say hello. But I left it anonymous. I suppose I did it out of amusement and I knew it would lift the guy's spirits (if it didn't blow off from under the windshield wiper before he got to it), but I just hope it didn't come off too stalker-ish.

I guess what struck me most was that I usually don't do things that overt. I'm very shy when it comes to guys, and usually am that girl that walks through the room, knowing the guys are saying "who's that girl?" and then darts out of the room, terrified to have so many eyes on her. So, doing something so forward as asking him to sign my petition or putting a happy note on his car was a bit out there for me.

Now I think on it, then last thing I want to do is come off like that guy that approached me on Friday. Arrg. This people relations thing is hard. Being a pretty smart kids raised on PBS and National Geographic has its benefits when writing a paper or taking a test, but when it comes time for me to talk to the guy who's been giving me butterflies for months, I'm all out of ideas. Such irony. :wink:

What is it with me and these weird messed up people that seem to be attracted to me???
So it's 10am, I'm sitting in the shade feeding the birds popcorn on campus when this weirdo in his late 20s walks up to me and starts yammering on about how he went to jail last night for pot, how his parents are abusive, how he doesn't work or go to school, just walks around, lives at a crappy hotel, stuff about self esteem and acid reflux????? Then he has the nerve to tell me I'm beautiful and ask for my number so we can hang out!!!! Do I really look that desperate? Or am I emitting some sort of "I can be your mommy" vibe?????

SIGH

   Today is beautiful. A bit cold, but clear and wonderful. I passed a lilac bush and the scent made me stop and smile. Anyone who would have seen me would have wondered if I was crazy or just absentminded, standing there, staring at a bush, smiling faintly. But I didn't care. It was beautiful.
   On the drive home I passed a pond where a blue-grey longlegged crane slowly waded through the marshy edge. 
The leaves are back. And so is my optimism.

I came across a fallen tree
I felt the branches. Are they looking at me?
Is this the place we used to love?
Is this the place that I've been dreaming of?